What's Cool In Road Cycling

Tour Doping War Now Has TWO Fronts!

Dope Testers Threaten Strike Action – Maybe the ASO should allow Cofidis to stay in the Tour but, should they get kicked out or treated unfairly, the other riders might not be able to find a place on the road to sit in protest, as the Dope testers might already be sitting there!

Ah Le Drama…

Seems like sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good, as the Tour continues to be the biggest thing on two wheels (next to Magnus) despite its organizers making slap-the-world-in-the-face decisions to keep us baffled.

Kelme are still out of the Tour, because one guy got pissed off, after getting fired, and decided to come to God (or at least the Vatican’s team…) and make good on a promise to screw the team by telling everyone that would listen (and yeah, we all did listen) that the place was a mobile pharmacy. Good enough for me, because Kelme should have been left out of the Tour anyway as it still had lots of unpaid riders (man how often do I bring that up?…).

But it looks as if Cofidis will need to be caught selling Phone cards with a vial of EPO and a bottle of chewable growth hormone pills shaped like Jean Marie’s head, before the Tour will do what it should.

Not enough that several Cofidis team staff and riders were caught red handed (or blue veined as it were). Screw the fact that along with what were probably a few gassed out cans of whip cream, a half eaten pair of edible undies, a used whip and some hangover medications, some used Eprex vials were reportedly found in the team leaders dumpster (no Viagra though, guaranteed!)

The French media have even reported David Millar as admitting to taking certian “products”. The truth is that he’s admitted nothing and nothing has been proven. It’s a shame that one of the pelotons great personalities and party animals is implicated, but the fact that Cofidis are in and Kelme are not is insane.

It did not prompt the Tour to do what everyone knows it should and get Cofidis the hell out of the Tour. I have had a “Migraine” ever since they gave Lance a combination pink slip and get well card as he was deep into a fight for his life (good move guys, that sure saved you…). And this is just as obvious and as bad (or worse) than inviting three French teams who’s 27 riders total wins didn’t add up to Super Mario’s grand Tour wins alone…

But then again, who cares!

I say this Tour goes off at record speed anyway, as the Dope testers (Frances National Drug testing Lab) are saying that they will go on strike, and that it will be renewable until demands are met.

Should the testers skip the whole thing, it could be anyone’s race this year. In fact, there could be a betting line on whether Petacchi can win more stages than the testers skip, which could be big fun. (not implying at all that Petacchi is anything but clean by the way!)

Won’t be much fun to see The Lion king roar at what might be his last tour. While Petacchi is still more than a hundred wins from being the “Next Lion King”, I love to watch him do what Mario used to, and the comparison is also big fun… But, if there is no testing, it wouldn’t be very much fun to be introduced to the next Tom Simpson.

Here’s hoping the French at the very least get the testers situation sorted. If some of the riders think all of the testing is a bit unfair, having another death on the road would be worse.

Get it fixed Jean Marie…

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